Sep. 25th, 2017

instantkarmma: (*sigh*)
Weird as it is to talk about, I have a pretty good track record helping people feeling suicidal. They have all been people I know or clients of mine though & today I reached out to someone a friend was talking with on Twitter. I'm hoping I didn't stick my foot in it, but they seemed receptive and I had them talking for about an hour. They were so far gone though...I don't feel like I helped them back from the brink. And I'm sad, but I'm not feeling like I thought I would. Maybe because the outcome is still unknown that it hasn't hit me but I've always been afraid to do suicide work because I didn't think I could handle it if I lost someone, that I would feel at fault & like I had failed. And I feel *awful* for this person and am still holding out hope that they decided to stick around yet I feel comfortable(?) about the help I was able to give. I mean, I feel like I did all I could. Maybe this is how a doctor feels when they have accepted there's no course of treatment left for their patient, I don't know. I wanted to get across that they were understood, that they were loved and not alone and from their responses I think at least that was effective. I hope so. Everyone deserves love & kindness.

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instantkarmma

October 2017

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